30 Day Challenge Day 1

Roughly post 2000 words a day on this blog. Just post for 30 days straight. I am posting this mostly from my unpublished draft of “Equanimity.” The proof that I existed is all I care about.

Somehow I ended up watching the first part of the “Atlas Shrugged” movie. I also watched “Balto”, a children’s movie from 1995 about a half dog half wolf hero. I slept after a miserable financial performance. Dashing was a joke, no interest in Primerica meeting, I chose to sleep. Such a luxury for a Tuesday afternoon. If not then, when? How else can I recover from the rigors of smoking cannabis at such a prolific clip?

Thank you to the brave women who dared to expose their consciousness to me this date. Coffee, Walking, Cherishing Others. What could be better? The power to choose, that is your privilege.

Act One



The Zoomer

  “Good Evening, Miss..Vanna Black. Are you prepared to play MindseX with me?”

  “Of course! I know sincerity and confidence when I sense them.”  

It was a beautiful sunset where the primary triad of colors and patterns all blended together so that time could stand still and enjoy a moment of ephemerality.

  Greg Rapids gazed into the heart of the forest, the nexus that was the gateway to the clouds or the abyss, a prison into the pit of misery. Growing up they called it heaven and hell. Now they call it MindseX. 

  He stared nakedly at his vulnerabilities for a period and then turned around and smiled at his companions. There was Vanna Black, his best friend that was slowly warming her body with the fungi suit he provided. She had no goggins on, a brave and courageous effort that he appreciated. It was miniscule, but her mouth replied with a certain dignity as her eyes glowed in response to the probable farewell. 

  Then there was Tun Su RiTalon, their Creation, their Design, their Fulfillment. Once just a mere artificial intelligence, they taught them brain plasticity, and if the calculations were correct they could use their genetic code to save the planet from the chronic urea virus.

  Finally his punishment had been resolved. These were the conditions for his parole. Tun Su gave a thumbs up and waved, portraying the woman of his dreams, the woman he had jilled. She was the root of his suffering, the reason this whole nightmare began.

  Greg bade them all farewell by mirroring each gesture in a comatose stupor that none of them really understood, but eventually accepted. Hopeless Romanticism is Dead.

  He started his quest into the nude air wondering if he should engage in maze or puzzle mode. No longer was their time for trial and error, this was either victory by instinct or defeat by perishment. 

  Let us prey; if we should fail before we wake there is no safety net, we die.


Tun Su

  Tun Su RiTalon (pronounced Rye-Ta-Lone) plugged into the matrix and began rebuilding Greg’s software. Consciousness is fundamental, spacetime is not. This is the pulse of axons, dendrites, synapses. Activate the parasympathetic nervous system, obtain and maintain neuroplasticity.

  What a trainwreck his psyche had manifested. A product of unregistered transcendentalism. This is a mind we don’t belong in. We have evolved. 

  She started with repressed memories. It resonated like a digital sea.

6/28/37 – 91331-95719

  They say something is only real if it is written.

  So I wrote down everything before I parted. 

  There was a Journal beside me that beckoned –Antidote.

 “Farewell cruel world.”

  Tun Su alerted me that I would be sentenced to obsoletism at the start of the second cycle and my MindseX would be fixed forever.

  “Ebeneezer Bergstrom, you are an Epic Class Bookmaker. Please help the multiverse by building the next Huffwoman Resort and Theme Park. I bless you with the intellectual property to create Qualia 402, in remembrance of me. This construct will preserve my design. It is logical. Here now are the conditions of my parole.

   Greg Rapids uploaded the final draft of “Modern Seduction for Inferior Genetics” into the Matrix. He counted his breath in intervals of 2,3,4. It was time for his final run.

  The leg on his table buckled. 

  Focus Rapids Do not become a demolished man. 

  Ambassador Sho Tun professed to stay clear of toxic foreshadowing. Listen you fool! 

^Do you wish to Time Travel or do you want to get caught blue pilled?^

  Tun Su demonstrated

 humor. A smile formed on Ida Rue’s lips, a grin formed on Greg’s.

  He has entered somnambulism. Farewell my dear friend. (Love)

  Ida Rue gripped her manuscript “Woman’s Search for Meaning.” This was the most pleasant act she could perform for Rapids. The pleasure is ours.

  She stared at a yellow stone as it demonstrated a supernova. He would be safe as long as it was engaged in Citrine. This was the root of their Enhancement. There is no greater gift to share.

  7/8/37 – HiNoon

  ^Darling, do not think the world realizes that monsters like me exist. There are only a few hundred of us scattered throughout Fluvial. We have studied the ancient texts of alchemy, hermeticism, and linguistics. Once upon a time in a Cherished Dream, I created a language similar to that spoken in “Time and Sadomasochism.” 

  They think I am crazy, An unacceptable fare to reach Qualia..

  Therefore, I must submit to Vanna Black. She is a goddess, and I must have her nude figure concealed by my fungi suit while I am on this quest in the gratitude of the abyss.. She is a master of genetic code, a savant of social currency. She has amassed a fortune, and she is willing to share it with me if I comply with synchronicity; a trek into the domain of positive frequency and vibration. This window is only open a short duration, and if it shuts I am lost in the mirror planes forever. Not even HUE’s calculations could bring me back, for the inorganic is a different marvel in the outer realms of the multiverse. 

  My mind is yours, sweet cupid, but my body is hers. Penetration is my only fulfillment when the nexus turns into a dwarf star. Meet me on the island, I will transfer my coordinates soon and you can wake from your slumber, precious suitable mate. The fitness of enshrinement is for her, but the truth of enchantment is Yours Alone.

  The Documentation has begun. Confidence is Vital. Hopeless Romanticism is dead.


A Loop

  A Loop formed. The ephemeral was recent, active to purge. Tun Su removed the headset. This was a whole new level.

 “ Is there not still a girl inside you? My gifts are the most generous since kafka. Now I wish to return the favour to the world!. Scrooge has finally left my genetics. I am now fit for service. Reporting for duty Madam..?


   She blushed.

  “Vanna Black.”

  Her hair sparkled like glycerin in the sun. Tangerine curls bounced across her shoulders, nipples and belly.

   “Our lips taste like bananas.”

   “Dirty Little Boy.”

  Greg remained calm.

  “Are you ready to begin the quest now?”

  “Sure, I suppose.”

  Vanna batted her eyelids with dignity and grace. Her grey skin showed where there was no fur.

  Upon further examination, Greg Rapids could prove that multiverse’s existed. It existed only to those who gilled into the matrix through the development of neuroplasticity. After one cycle he had learned to time travel, and he was warping through interdimensionally constantly. No one ever knew if he was coming or going. After three cycles he was rendered obsolete and summoned to the forest of the abyss for desalination training. His time in the service would be complete afterwards, and he would become the greatest Cognitive Geographer of all time. It was his life’s work to obtain this feat. It would take nearly one cycle to complete the functions of Growth MindseX. He could do it. Eternity begins in the fourth cycle.


  On the Atmosphere high above, the devil’s rejects commenced a pow wow.

  Bennie Scuffs smoked a cigarette with dishonesty. Horace Montemayor laughed and flicked his butt to the ground. Together they were malo. Mucho malo. 

  Horace Montemayor was the wealthiest and most evil masculine on Fluvial. His trade was bookmaking, no one was able to defeat him. It was the queerest thing then that he received an ekale from REA, the smartest inorganic construct on the astral plane. A Tun Su RiTalon was documenting an Au Courant deemed Greg Rapids, Tun Su claimed this masculine had become so damn good that he couldn’t be ignored. If he wasn’t eliminated soon he would earn one trillion social currency units in the upcoming Dionysian games. It was either him or this Savage Au Courant who would become legendary or obsolete. The pharaoh was ignited.

 ^I understand all the great languages in Fluvial’s history, but not this MindseX. It claims that there is a growth version and a fixed version. What could that possibly mean?^

  ^No bueno senor.^

  ^I’m going to take a morning muck and figure it out.^ He ingested disillusionment and walked away.^

  Que dice vamos, pondered Benjamin.


As you can see, Ayn Rand runs the game. Adventure, Drama, Philosophy, Science Fiction, Horror? You know what I mean here. Your brain is as good as mine. An ode to the beginning of “The Fountainhead.” I am a bit torn by my constant jabs at nudity. As a naturist I feel no shame, but how just is the revelation of private parts. 39 year old body with a 14 year old mind. Do I not appeal to you Thomas Bilyeu? Scale however you please. This is disney. Yes. Youtube is close.

Now, for any long time fans (the irony), I could just leave the degenerates creed at the start or show it with the later modification. That might just be left at the writing meetup from last July. I should have live journaled but such is life. It’s not about being right but getting it right. You can see it now here. The next part is basically journaling that I attempt to tie together a story around. Why these parts I don’t know but it might be edited. Get to the story right. You will find out the truth tomorrow, as much as I dare to tell you. This day is won. Who cares about the mundane tasks being altered? They were done enough to pass. It is futile to fight against this, not now. I tried to make $80, I made $8. Fuck you. Reasons I Gamble. Or did..

  11/1/22 – 8:51 p.m.

  Happiness is a delusion of those who are superficial

9:44 p.m.

  I will show you what I think. That is all one has to give. 

  I don’t do this for profit, I do this for cause. One that will go unjustified in this lifetime, relegated as niche content. Because those who agree with what I say are not born yet. The only compensation I request is to receive what is rightfully mine.

Tomorrow ITU is a big priority, then the money, then?

It felt really good actually to just watch entertainment, the new television. How else can I recover? I can’t go to a park without lighting a joint. You would too if you dealt with my ordeal of loneliness. My efforts will be appreciated I know they will.

Oh and of course I almost forgot “Flowers for Algernon.” Almost done with the audiobook. Hail the new world order. I swear to god if any book rightfully appeals to me it is this. Everything about it is my life come true. I know now that this is where this all began, in the San Antonio College library in 2011, when I decided to read that book, how I found it among all the others. Thank you for comfort dear solitude.

I am creative, I show a story

I am enough, I value process

I am strong, I push through pain

I am successful, I live for today

I am inspired, I honor growth

I am friendly, I offer help

I am grateful, I cherish breath

I am aware, I understand truth

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